Home Care Marketing & Sales Solutions by ASN
Dawn Fiala, Lisa Marsolais, Annette Ziegler, and Valerie VanBooven RN BSN provide insight into home care marketing strategies. They cover in-person, in-field sales and online marketing every other week. These podcast episodes are part of the Home Care Marketing Mastermind, sponsored by Approved Senior Network®. Find more information at https://ASNHomeCareMarketing.com
Home Care Marketing & Sales Solutions by ASN
Handling Family Conflict: How Home Care Agencies Can Help Families Get to “Yes” Faster
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Families don’t delay home care because they love waiting. They delay because everyone in the room is protecting something: a parent’s independence, a spouse’s pride, a sibling’s wallet concerns, or their own fear of making the wrong call. We walk through what’s really happening behind “We need more time” and how to move a family toward clarity without pushing, pressuring, or picking sides.
We share the most common reasons families hesitate, then break down the four main stakeholders you’re actually communicating with: the older adult, the adult daughter, the adult son, and the exhausted spouse caregiver. From there, we get tactical with listening skills and specific questions that uncover hidden objections, build trust fast, and turn a tense assessment into a calmer partnership conversation. You’ll hear practical language for responding to “Mom doesn’t want help,” “My brother disagrees,” “It’s too expensive,” and “We’ll handle it ourselves,” while still keeping your expert role.
Then we go past the signed agreement, because client experience and retention are won in the first 30 days. We cover expectation-setting, common complaints, the CARE framework for de-escalating tough calls, and a proactive check-in cadence that prevents silent dissatisfaction from turning into cancellations. We also dig into caregiver matching, personality fit, and how to gather the right details during intake so the first week of care starts strong.
If you work in home care sales, senior care marketing, or client services, this one is a practical playbook you can use immediately. Subscribe for more training, share this with a teammate who handles assessments, and leave a review with the hardest family objection you want us to tackle next.
Visit our website at https://asnhomecaremarketing.com
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Hi everyone. Hi everybody. Hello. Good afternoon.
Welcome And Housekeeping
SPEAKER_02We're gonna get started here. I guess we can get started now. We've got I'm gonna apologize for my glasses. I had cataract surgery, so just ignore the Martian. Look like an alien. The alien eyes. It's temporary. But good news is I can see again. So that's all that really matters. So I'm Don Fiela and I have been with this company now four years, approved senior network. I have a very strong background in the home care world. Helped grow the last business I was with to 3.5 million in under four years. I love working with you guys. I the passion that all of you have for your mission is amazing. So I'm just really happy to be here today. Annette. Okay. Hi everybody.
SPEAKER_04My name is Annette Sigler, and I've been with ASN over two years. I too have 20 plus years home care and senior living experience. I am the trainer for the sales training classes, and I love what I do. I love teaching you all the tips and tricks how to get those private pay referrals. I'm glad you guys are here today. We got a great program.
SPEAKER_03Lisa. Hey, I'm Lisa Marcella. I've been here almost four years now. I can't believe it. But I do all the things, especially after you're in programs with us. I'll help walk through any of the marketing and just we'll all keep on track together. I've been in home care forever and a day as well, and I wore every single hat imaginable because it's hard to stay in your own lane in home care. And I will pass it on to is Valerie. No, Valerie's not here today.
SPEAKER_02No, Valerie's on vacation. She is a co-owner and founder of Approved Senior Network, and she does all of our high-tech online, I don't know, guru stuff. She's really good at it. All right. So housekeeping, please keep your lines muted unless speaking. Share stories, experiences, tips, ask us questions, make recommendations, tell us what you want to know. This we're going to talk about, but we're going to get into asking you guys some things today. So I'm hoping you'll participate. We're not going to call on anyone. So it's only if you want to. No one has to participate. But we're getting into the nitty-gritty with dealing with families and what can you say and what shouldn't you say? And how do you get them to talk to you and make them happy? So towards the end, we will get into that. And I think you guys will like it. Two, please remember that there is a free giveaway. One attendee will receive a set of customized leaf behinds with your logo, colors, and contact information. You must attend to be eligible. So we will create them for you with your logo and your everything. You have to agree to send us pictures. So please type yes in the chat for a chance to be drawn and win those leave behinds. So today we are going to talk about handling family conflict and getting to a yes faster. So we're going to cover why families delay.
Why Families Delay Saying Yes
SPEAKER_02Because I've heard a million times, oh, we're thinking about it. I've got to talk to my brother, my sister, my uncle, how to get to the yes faster, how to handle objections. And then after care starts, it's not over. It's not, it's just beginning. So we're going to talk a little bit about that today, too. So why don't families say yes right away? There's lots of reasons. And I know most of the time we think it's price sensitivity. A lot of people will lean into that. We just don't know if we have the money. And some people don't have the money. That is true. And that is a fair to for them to say. But sometimes that's just some way to get you to just back off for a little bit, let them think about it. So let's get to the reasons why a lot of them won't say yes. There's a family disagreement, and I have been involved in this many times that adult children don't always agree on home care. Some want them placed, some want them left alone. Whoever lives in town typically knows they need help, but the ones who live out of state don't. I've talked to mom, she says she's fine. We don't need to do anything. So that this is a big one. I don't know if Annette and Lisa agree with that, but that can be a big one. Caregiver guilt. The daughters and sons feel like they should be doing more for themselves, more themselves. They should be helping mom and dad. And so accepting help feels like a failure. They feel like they're doing something wrong. Mom and dad took care of them. It's time for them to take care of mom and dad. And they're feeling guilty about that. Fear of loss of independence. This is the senior, of course. They don't want to lose control over their day-to-day. They don't want someone coming into their home and telling them what to do. And then the wait and see default. This is a big one. Everyone quietly hopes that things are going to improve on their own. So no one makes a move at all. So you'll hear from these families every 30 days. They've all had the assessment set up and then they call and say, Mom said no. And she's probably okay. It'll probably be okay. And then 30 days later, something else happens with mom and they call you again. And this can go on and on. So these are the main reasons. Lisa and Annette, you guys have any other reasons you can think of? Or anybody here? Do you have any other things besides price? Because I know that's also one that people why they maybe don't say yes. Anybody have anything they want to share?
SPEAKER_04I think everything you talk about, we're going to go a little deeper into it, but we just having the right comeback and yes, being ready. Discussing and educating them on why it's better to have a caregiver in place because that person that never calls you, they end up calling you on a weekend in an emergency.
SPEAKER_02Yes, then you might not be able to start that case. And now it's a scramble. Yes.
SPEAKER_03What I used to hear a lot is let's wait for home health to come out. And it's like, oh boy, if you're waiting for home health to call, that's gonna be a really it takes a while. It takes a while. That there's a lot of different paperwork. Whereas we can go out right now and we can go whenever you schedule us.
SPEAKER_02So it's a little a lot of times they think home health is gonna do everything and they may not even need home care. That's that's why they're waiting.
SPEAKER_03And then that's and you have to explain that, yeah, the differences and how they work together.
SPEAKER_02That's a big one for sure. All right, so the four people you're really trying to sell to these are the stakeholders involved. They each have different fears, they each have different priorities. The senior
Who Really Makes The Decision
SPEAKER_02themselves, they're focused on maintaining independence, dignity, and routine, and fears being a burden or losing control. That's one of the people. Another one is that adult daughter. Often the primary decision maker, she's driven by guilt, love, weight of being the one who handles it. She is almost always the person who calls. In my years of experience, it's almost always that adult daughter or even daughter-in-law that is calling about mom or dad. The adult son, they're often focused on the cost and logistics of everything. They may be less emotionally connected, but quick to voice their concerns. And they they will speak up. They're in the assessment or they're on the phone during the assessment or FaceTiming. And then the spouse. And the spouse is often exhausted from caregiving. They feel torn between loyalty and self-preservation, and they need permission to accept help. Who do they need permission from? The senior, their spouse. So they they understand how their husband or wife is feeling. They don't want to rock them boat. They also feel like they should be able to handle this. So there's a lot going on. And it's important that we talk about this because when you walk into an assessment, sometimes it just, oh, these are the people I'm dealing with. But there's usually a lot more going on and a lot more people involved. And they do all have different priorities and different fears or reasons for saying no. And Annette and Lisa, just jump in if you guys want to add. You have lots of years of experience in all of this and have met with probably thousands of families, as I have.
SPEAKER_04I think everything you're saying is true. There are, whenever I had a son that was, there are some really good sons, and we're not saying the sons aren't good, but it really is a lot of times the daughter who's like, you know, running it all. But a lot of times this is new to them. It's scary, and you have to have empathy when you're talking to them, and they need to understand that you've been through this before, you help people like them. And that's why it's so important to try to get to the assessment to meet people in person. I think that's a really big thing, and help them understand all their objections. And I think the more experienced you are doing the assessments, there were times where the the maybe the senior didn't even want to look at me. Get out of my house. I don't even want you here. So there's a lot of situations that you have to be ready for, and you there is a way out and just talking to them, how you're gonna help them. But we'll talk more about that as the class goes as it goes on today.
SPEAKER_02And then too, the adult daughter, a lot of times you're on the phone with them and you do need to get the assessment scheduled. That's the whole point of the phone call is to get into the home. And she will say, My brother's never gonna go for this, or my parents are never gonna go for this. And I will say, let's schedule the assessment, there's no cost, so that I can tell them and educate them so they understand. They don't know what this looks like. And of course, that makes it scarier than it actually is. Okay, so what each person is really thinking. So I thought this was really good. The senior, what they say is I'm fine on my own. What they're really thinking is I'm afraid of losing my independence and my identity. And so when you understand it, because sometimes they can just feel like they're sitting in the corner, they're they're mad, they're angry, how dare their children, and they'll even call their children out. Good thing I took care of you when you were little. I wish you'd do the same for me. They'll literally call them out in front of you. But it helps to understand and even to tell the adult children behind the scenes they're afraid of losing their independence. They're not fine on their own. They know they're not fine on their own. But this is really the catalyst to all of this. This is what they're thinking. The daughter, I just want what's best for my mom. And then what she's thinking is, am I doing enough? Will I regret this? And am I gonna regret leaving her in the hands of a caregiver? Maybe it should be me. I should be there. That's what they're thinking. The son wants to know usually what does it cost? And then he doesn't want to be responsible for a bad decision. He doesn't want to spend mom and dad's money on a bad decision. He doesn't want to be responsible for that. The spouse says we're managing, and really they're exhausted. I need relief, but I feel guilty admitting it. And the whole family will say, we need more time. And that's just because are we making the right decision? What if it's wrong? So that's all that's at play right now. When you're in the home before you get out there, these are the things that are going on. So slow down to speed up. So the instinct is to present more information, explain your services, overcome objectives with facts. But the fastest path to a decision is actually through listening.
Questions That Unlock The Real Issue
SPEAKER_02Ask questions and convince later. The more you can get them to talk, the more you're going to understand what's really the issue here. And when it comes out, it's like a light bulb. And you want to even say, oh, so this is really what's going on. You can't do that. But you will, it will uncover itself as you're asking questions. So questions that open the door, what concerns you most right now? I will even call someone out. I'll say, You've been quiet. Do you have concerns about this? Maybe it's the adult son, maybe it's the spouse. If they're not talking at all and they just look tight-lipped and maybe upset that I'm there, you're quiet. Do you have an opinion about this? Or what are your thoughts? What concerns you? Do you have concerns about a caregiver coming into the home? What would have happened? What would have to happen before you felt comfortable, comfortable moving forward? What worries you about bringing someone new into the home? What does a good outcome look like to your family? And I always did ask that. What would it look like for this to be successful? What are you wanting to gain from this? If you were to decide to move forward, what does success look like for you? And so why this works is these questions do through three things. They uncover hidden objections that they're not talking about. They make the family feel heard and respected, and they shift the dynamic from a sales call to a partnership conversation. When they feel like you're willing to listen to them, you understand them, they start to trust you. And when you have this open dialogue, they can hear your experience because you've dealt with other families. Oftentimes the spouses feel just like you, or daughters feel a lot like you, or adult children feel this way. I've run into this before. And I can promise you, we start services and everything is fine. So it gives you that opportunity to be an expert, also, which you are in this industry and in this field. They've never been through this before. And families usually just do this once. Once, maybe once the care is set up, they've got their pri their company, they're done. They're not investigating and researching this again. It's one time. You, it's been 30 times, 40 times. They can they're gonna lean into that experience. So the most common objections and how to respond. If they say we're not ready yet, I completely understand. Can I ask what would need to change before you felt ready? Or why don't you feel ready? What are what is your hesitation? Mom just doesn't want the help. You can say that's very common. And you know what's surprising? Those adult children are shocked to hear that's common. They think their mom and dad are very difficult, very hard to please, and they're being impossible. They don't realize that all seniors are like this. And when you tell them that's very common, they're like, oh, maybe this is doable then. But would it help if I spoke with your mom directly just to answer questions, not to add pressure, but just to add questions? My brother disagrees, and then you can say family decisions are hard. What would make him feel more comfortable with the idea? It's too expensive. That's a fair concern. Let's look at what level of support would be more impactful and more manageable. And then we will handle it ourselves. I respect that. What does your current routine look like? And what's the hardest part? The hardest part, I would always say, what's the hardest part of the day? Let's at least get the hardest part of the day covered for you so that there are no more falls or whatever might be going on. We only need a little help. That's a great place to start. We can begin small and adjust as we evolve. Lisa, Annette, any questions? Anything to add? Does anybody else have any questions or anything you have?
SPEAKER_04I do agree with, and I would always say this: you're better off starting now, even if we just a couple days a week or whatever your minimums are. And I would explain to them this way you have our services. And if a situation occurs, if you end up going to the hospital or you for some reason need more services, you just give us a call and you're already our customer. You're already in a system. Rather than waiting, I used to always say, do you don't want to have to wait to an emergency situation? And that's a great way to explain it.
SPEAKER_02I would say it's like a layer of protection, plus you're in the system. We don't have to come out and sign an agreement. We don't like maybe something happens, maybe you're all out of town and you need 24s and you didn't know you were going. It's an emergency out of state. And everyone wants to leave, but mom, you just call the office and we cover it. We're not having to do an agreement, we're not having to do another stuff. You're covered. It's like a backup plan. That's a really good point
Common Objections And Best Replies
SPEAKER_02in it. Yep. All right. Don't fight the objection. Use acre, the acre method. So you're going to acknowledge, clarify, recommend, and then educate. So I completely understand why you feel that way. This is a big decision. Clarify. Can you tell me more about what's driving this concern? Recommend. Based on what you've shared, here's what I suggest as a first step. Remember, you're the expert. If you aren't wearing that expert hat during your assessment, you're not going to sign them. You are more about home care, even if it's your first assessment, you probably still know more about home care than they do. And so if you're not going to be the expert and making recommendations while you're in there doing that assessment, you're probably not going to sign them. And then E is educate. Here's what we've seen work well in similar situations. And that is always helpful. I had someone just like this. They always will follow me. I don't know if this happened to you guys or any of you. That adult daughter, adult son will follow me outside and say, My mom was really nice to you. I'm telling you right now, she's going to be horrible at the caregiver. She's horrible. She doesn't want this. She's going to yell at them. They're not going to be friends. You said they're going to be friends. There's no way they're going to be friends. And when I say that you are like the hundredth adult child that's followed me out of the home to say this, to rat out there. Exactly. And it works out. I promise you, it's going to work out. They're not going to be mean. Some of them are mean to the caregiver, but they're never as bad as the adult children think they're going to be.
SPEAKER_05That's so funny.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. All right. When family members disagree, because it does happen, and I've had some drop drop-down fights while I'm in there. They're arguing, and it's very this picture is real, not a real picture, but like this. I've seen this. I have seen them stand up and I've had people get up, slam the door, go back in the back of the house and slam the door. I've had them leave. Sure happen. It's really important that you don't choose sides. Nobody's crazy. No one's going off the Richter scales. You cannot, you're the neutral, you're Switzerland. You cannot take sides. So the moment you align with one family member, you lose credibility with everyone else, and you don't really know who's in charge. So you might pick the wrong side. So just don't pick sides. Stay neutral and focus on the client's well-being. Become the facilitator. Your role isn't to win an argument, it's to help the family find their own agreement. Ask questions that shift the focus to shared goals. So if they're arguing off in the corner, of course you're not going to get up and like you're not a referee. But you can say, I hear both of your sides, they're both valid. Let's get back to mom's not safe at home alone. Let's start there. And then both of you can let's address both of your concerns and try to get them talking again. I swear I could be a psychologist after this, but don't do that if mom is saying no, right? You have to be smart about this. But maybe there's some questions that you can use that will calm everybody in the room down because it can get, it doesn't get heated all the time, but it can get heated. Just never take sides. That's really important you don't take sides. So the credibility is important that you keep that. I've always said to anyone I've ever trained, if you're doing what's right by the senior, you're good. You're good. No matter what's happening, whatever the situation is in home care, if you're doing what's right by the senior, you can always agree that was the right thing to do. You never have to go back and go, oh, that was really a bad decision. You have that's where my head always goes when I'm like, oh my God, what do we do? What's best for the senior? That's what you do. And it's never failed me. Have you guys had some drop-down fights? Have you had this kind of stuff go on? Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh my god.
SPEAKER_02All different types of families. And yeah, and I think you know, and it's so uncomfortable. It's so uncomfortable. It really is uncomfortable. Yes. And they're embarrassed. The parents will be like, Can you two just stop? This is so embarrassing.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_04I think they're all stressed. And I think you know, being there and no saying, I understand this is stressful. You've got a lot of going on. Giving it's what's I think I'm trying. I used to do a lot of assessments. Once in a while, I would walk in and it was perfect. They signed it. Oh, yeah.
Staying Neutral During Family Fights
SPEAKER_04Once in a while was like a jackpot. But most of the most of these assessments, you're dealing with families, sons, daughters, husbands, wives, emotions. Best that you can be the facilitator and be the expert and show them how you can help them. And also looking at the scene, talking to that senior. They're the person that you're going to be caring for. And sons are daughters. We know they can they're caring for their family member. But if you look at that senior and talk to them, oh, I see you're using a walker now and talk about things that you can help them with. We can bring your garbage out to the curb. We can help you take a shower and you know helps them understand why you're there.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. I think everyone kind of sees that there's a a neutral party. And so they're like your kids, the one the first one to tell wins, right? They get their story.
SPEAKER_02So they want to get their and I think some of the arguments I've seen is one wants mom placed because they're just scared to death that something terrible is going to happen. And the other one wants her to be able to stay home. And mom wants to be alone at home. That tends to be a pretty typical situation. And so in that situation, I will say to mom, Do you it doesn't sound like either of them want you to be home alone? We can all agree on that. They don't so try to find common ground. Nobody wants you to be home alone. Yep. Everyone's like, yep, that's true. You want to stay at home or do you want to move? They're almost always going to say they want to stay home. So then now it's all we're going to do home care, then that's where we're at. Even if this one wants her to move, she wants, let's give her the opportunity. She's earned that right at 90 years old to stay home and try it. If it doesn't work, then maybe she moves. But let's try. So that's kind of the scenario that I've ran into the most, maybe. So anyway, hope all of this is helping you guys that haven't, you're out signing and we don't want to scare anybody. Some of them are perfect, like Annette said. But yeah, good to be prepared. Trial closes. Smaller commitments create bigger decisions. So Annette suggested this too. Let's just try a couple days a week, whatever your minimum is, if they're
Trial Starts That Feel Low Risk
SPEAKER_02really scared, really hesitant. Are you ready to start? Puts enormous pressure on a family that's uncertain. Instead, make the decision feel small, reversible, and low risk. Instead of asking, do you want to sign up for home care? Are you ready to get started? Should we move forward? What if we tried just three mornings a week to start? Would a two-week trial help everyone feel more comfortable about this? What if we began with just a few hours and saw how it felt? Or can we agree to revisit this in two weeks after a short test run? That would be my last, you know, kind of thing. I would probably, it depends on your minimums. It depends on what you're can you get caregivers to come out just for a few hours in the morning. I don't know if you can or you can't. It depends on what what area you're in. But small and then knowing, because I would say this is our service agreement. It's not a contract, it's not for the rest of your life. That I would that I'm saying, it's it's not like this big legal. Sometimes it was a thick document. But this is not a contract. You're not binded for the rest of your life. It is a service agreement. That's it. Make it simple, make it easy. It does feel like, oh God, who's gonna I've had them, who's gonna sign it? I don't want to sign it. Nobody wants to sign it. Nobody wants to be responsible. So the hard part begins when service begins. The families relax once care starts. Then reality sets in. That caregiver isn't exactly what they imagine. That does happen sometimes. Sometimes the schedule
After The Signature Things Get Real
SPEAKER_02shifts a little bit. Emotions resurface. Your job doesn't end at the signed agreement. It's just beginning. And so again, this is going to depend on how your company, your structure is set up. When I was out marketing, I did all the signing. And if something bad went on with one of my clients or they were unhappy, I wanted to know about it. And if it was big enough of a deal, I would jump back in and I would fix it because they trust me. They like me. And they would always say before I left, we can still talk to you, right? You're not going anywhere, right? I'm the one they've latched on to. I'm the one they trusted enough to sign that agreement. So now if I just disappear into the sunset, they're scared again. It's all starting all over again. That doesn't mean you need to be attached to them for the rest of your life. I would say to them, your scheduler is this is her contact information. If you have any scheduling questions, schedule needs to change, don't need services Friday. That's all her. Reach out to her. You have any issues at all, reach out to her. You can also reach out to me. I'm not going anywhere. And so I would get involved again if I needed to. How about you guys?
SPEAKER_04I was going to say, oh well, this probably happened to you too. I'd be I do the assessment, they'd think, Oh, are you gonna be doing the care? Yeah, yes. No, but we have a we're gonna make a great match. But if I really sold them, if they the mother, she liked me, she'd say, Oh, are you gonna be my caregiver? No, I'm not, but we have some really good people, and I'll make sure I'm gonna go to the office and talk to our scheduler. We're gonna make a really good match and have a great caregiver for you.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, definitely 100%. I still did keep in touch a little bit with texting and especially if the person could text, right? Or and the family too. They would just want to text and get updates, which I was happy to do. It takes a couple of minutes. And they understood though that they did need to call the office or speak with the schedulers. But yeah, I know that people latched on a little bit and I would just keep it going. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And some latch on more than others, and eventually you start to because they'll call and say, I don't buy little services Saturday. And I'm like, okay, I will let your scheduler know, right? Because that's yeah. Okay, to get them to sign and then just disappear. That's icky. That's an icky feeling. I sold you and now I'm leaving. That's not fun for anybody either. So it's important to move them forward to their next person, but also to offer to be around if they need you. Some common complaints that you can hear and what to do. When they say the caregiver doesn't do it like mom does, that's mom feeling a loss of control and grief over their parents' changing condition. But it could also
Complaints And Setting Expectations Early
SPEAKER_02be that the caregiver is not following instructions. So don't always assume that there's some, they're just being impossible. It could be that the caregiver is not doing something right. They're always on their phone. And that could be the fear that their loved one isn't truly cared for. Now, I always explained in the assessment your caregiver is going to be on their phone to clock in and clock out and to check off their tasks. That's part of their job. They're not texting, they're not on Facebook, they're not on Instagram. That's not what they're doing. That's not what they should be doing. They need to clock in, they need to clock out, they need to mark their tasks that's completed. So set that expectation. Otherwise, they're going to assume that they're playing around on their phone and not taking care of their parents. Mom doesn't like strangers in the house, guilt that they made the wrong choice. The schedule isn't working. This could be stress for many routine disrupting daily life. We expected more. This could have been misaligned expectations. When you're signing them, be very clear. This isn't perfection. We're dealing with human beings. Your mom and dad are human, the caregivers are human. People call out sick. Things happen. We will always fix it. We will always be here, but it's not going to be perfection right out the gate. It might take a couple of weeks to level up. I'm just being completely transparent with you. And I think it's important to start that way. If it's like, oh yeah, we've got the best service in town. Everybody loves us. We never make a mistake. They're going to be so happy. You've now set yourself up for failure because they are human. We are dealing with humans and they are going to be late. They are going to call out sick. They are going to know things happen. So the expectation should be realistic when signing them too. Anything to add, Annette, Lisa? No.
SPEAKER_04Just like you said, I always would explain. But when we usually usually when I did the intro when one of us would go and introduce the caregiver on the first day, I would explain now they're going to use their phone to clock in. They have to do their task. Just like you said, you have to make sure they understand they're going to be on their phone. And again, don't set the expectations too high because, like you said, it's things happen. And I always let the family know we try to we do our best to make a really good match. Sometimes we make a mistake. Maybe they're not a good match. Let us know. We'll correct that. We can send another caregiver.
SPEAKER_02And I think when I would say that too, I would say, no one's going to get in trouble because the chemistry wasn't there. Call us. They're not going to get fired because the chem because I can have a chatty Kathy come to one home, everyone helps her. And then Chatty Kathy goes to another home and they can't deal with it. No deal with it. And there's nothing wrong with Chatty Kathy or Chatty Patty, whatever I used to call her. It's just no chemistry. And that's okay. And no one's going to get in trouble because they really don't want it. They'll just quit services rather than tell on the caregiver. That's what happens. They need to learn.
SPEAKER_04It's okay to tell you if it's not working out. It's an easy fix.
SPEAKER_03So I like that. No one's going to get in trouble if the chemistry was off. That's really good.
SPEAKER_02Yes, I used to say that all the time. And I always did it the assessment because I wanted them to remember that. Um you're not with this, you're not answering the complaint. You're addressing their emotion first. So just know that emotion is driving a lot of this. A lot of this. The care response framework. When a family calls with a complaint, your instinct may be to defend your team or explain the policy. Try to resist that instinct. Use the care framework to de-escalate, connect, and resolve
The CARE Method For Tough Calls
SPEAKER_02in that order. So it's calm or it's care. Calmly listen. Let them finish. Don't interrupt. Don't prepare your defense while they're talking. Just listen. And if you're preparing your defense in your head, you're not listening. And so you do just need to shut everything down and really listen to what they're saying. Acknowledge their feelings. I can understand why that would be frustrating. So you're validating them before offering a resolution. Resolve together. Ask what would make this right for them. Involve them in your solution. Don't just hand one down. And if they don't have one, just I don't know. I'm just really frustrated. You can say, I've had this kind of thing happen before, and this is what we did. And does that work for you? So you should have some solution in mind, but let them be a part of that if they have an idea in mind. A lot of times their solutions are better than yours anyway. I was willing to credit them for the day. You know, I was shipped. I was ready to, oh, I think we should have half off for that day. Okay. I was thinking before that sounds good. Yeah. So let them tell you because you're probably going to give them more than they're going to ask for. Explain next steps. Be specific. I'll follow up with the caregiver today and I'll call you back by 3 p.m. And then always do it. They don't need another thing to fall through the cracks right now. They're already upset. And if you can't call at three o'clock, call them to tell them. I can't call you at three o'clock. It might be 2:30. Something's come up. I'm not going to be able to call you at three. Will four work? Don't let three pass and then be like, oh, sorry, I got stuck in a meeting. They're already upset. You've got to follow through for sure. Never get defensive. Say this instead. So don't say our caregiver did exactly what she's supposed to do. So maybe they've said, I need her, I want you up there wiping the top of the cupboards. Okay, we don't do that. And the caregiver says, we don't do that. That's I'm not allowed to do that. That's dangerous. You don't say our caregiver did exactly what she's supposed to do. She did. You say, I can understand. That would be frustrating. Let's work through this together. I'm going to go over company policy with you. We need to make sure they're safe. It's different when you say, I understand how you're feeling about this, but instead of our caregiver did exactly what she's supposed to do. That's not our policy. Instead of that, I want to make sure we get this right for your family. You were told about this at the start. Thank you for telling me I'd rather know than not know. Let's talk about this. Here's what I'm going to do. So it's just better. Again, this is all about listening to always listening to them. Your tone matters as much as your words. So always be calm and listen to them. Even if sometimes I've had some adult daughters that call me every week. They're just, you want to say hello, Beth. Yep. What do you need? Every day. Every day. What did the caregiver do now? Did she breathe wrong? I just get so frustrated sometimes. But there's something, and eventually you get to what's really gnawing at Beth. It's not that the caregiver did XYZ. There's something else usually going on. So listening is the most important thing and trying to figure out what's really happening. The first 30 days matter most. So most cancellations happen within the first 30 days. And so from day one to day three, you can
The First 30 Days Retention Plan
SPEAKER_02call after the first visit. How did it go? Don't wait for them to call you. It's so important to be proactive. And I think we get so busy in home care and we're like, the caregiver showed up, must be good. I heard nothing's good news. No is good news. No, yeah, you're hoping no news is good news. But we should, even if we don't hear from them, we should call and see how it went. It's much easier to hear. She just, I don't know, she wiped down this and then used that same washcloth to wash down this. That grossed me out. Just hearing that, get it corrected. If she does this every day and the senior is not willing to tell them what's, they're just gonna quit. So that first visit, that first call, that first visit is huge. It's a very big deal. Week one, check in again, acknowledge the the adjustment takes time, share one small positive observation. Maybe the caregiver said something that the client did. It's important to be communicating with the caregiver before you call the client. So one, you have a heads up if something went south. And two, maybe get some kind of feedback that you can share with that adult child who lives out of state. They want to hear that she's doing good or he's doing good. Week two, reset expectations if needed. Remind them, home care is a partnership, improves in time. That's only if they're not happy, obviously. Day three, schedule a formal check-in call, review what's working, what to adjust and what's next. So they should hear from you four times that first month, especially if they're bigger hours, because a lot more can happen on a 12-hour shift than a four-hour shift. So keep being proactive about this and reaching out to them is really important. Also, we've been talking about this a lot in our company. Getting a review from them when they're still happy and nothing bad's happened. I skip the first two weeks.
SPEAKER_03Like right away.
SPEAKER_02Right away, first two weeks of service, they're happy, everything is good. Try and get a review. That's a perfect time to get a review from them. Navigating difficult family personalities. You've got the long-distance daughter, she's anxious because she can't see what's happening. She wants frequent, detailed updates, respond and proactive communication and written notes. And you'd be the
Personality Types And Better Matching
SPEAKER_02same way if you lived out of state. So that's important. The controlling son needs to feel in charge, involve himself in every decision, give him a clear role, he'll become your ally, not your adversary, adversary. The guilty spouse feelings they're falling, they're failing their partner by accepting help. Reframe the narrative. Getting support is an act of love, not surrender. I used to always say, now you can spend quality time together. Now you're instead of being the caregiver, you can spend quality time together. Watch a movie together, hang out together. Of a sibling who never agrees, redirect every disagreement back to one question. What would your parent want? That's the only opinion that truly matters. Turn complaints into loyalty. The best agencies don't avoid problems, they solve them better than anyone else. So the loyalty formula family that experiences a problem and watches you solve it quickly, professionally with genuine care becomes your loyal client. They will infer you, they stay, they trust you with more hours. So handling sometimes a complaint is an opportunity because it gives you the opportunity to show them you in action that you're fixing this for them. So we have two scenarios. What time have we got? We've got a little bit of time. Two scenarios that we're going to go over today and hope you guys jump in. Scenario one, before care starts. The situation is mom
Role Play Scenario And Closing Actions
SPEAKER_02has been refusing help for months. Two siblings are divided. One wants care now, and one says she's not ready. You have a meeting with both of them over the phone. So how do you open the conversation? What questions do you ask? How do you avoid taking sides while moving things forward? Anyone want to jump in? As long as we're one. At least I have to.
SPEAKER_04We would love to have you. I would I would say, I know you love your mom. I understand where you're coming from. But what is your mom, what does your mom need? How can we help your mom? Don't take sides, but just to try and understand that they both have their reasons. I have brothers and sisters. We did the same thing when my parents needed help. And nobody really agreed, unfortunately. There were two agreed and two didn't agree, but we all had our own reasons for different things. But just trying to understand, let them know that you understand them and but not taking their side. Does anybody hear? We'd love to hear from some of you. Who's had some experience? We were anybody? I would say, okay, okay. Yes. Hi Brian. Thank you.
SPEAKER_00In a situation like this, I I try to let the kids know that it's better to be preemptive. And if they wait for an incident to force the issue, then the incident could be catastrophic. So that and that's the truth. You're not putting any kind of fear in them to manipulate them. That's just what happens. And I also say that sometimes people are resistant to care. And I empathize with them. I say, I don't want anybody taking care of me either. I understand that. But they're not there really they're there to help improve the quality of life. All right. But I but the the second key thing that I like to mention is if they like the caregiver, their resistance is going to melt away. And within within a month, they won't live without the caregiver.
SPEAKER_05Yes.
SPEAKER_00So I'm trying to make those I try to make those two key points. And uh you can't sell home care. Either they're gonna take it or they're not. And so the the main thing is trying to be preemptive. If there's some issues right now, we can avoid an incident. That's a good idea to move ahead. If it's a budget thing, there's not much you can do about it. But if they have the dough, then then they need to move ahead. And then they have to just knock down the barrier of having that stranger in the house, and you take care of that by providing a decent a good caregiver.
SPEAKER_02Thank you, Brian. That's that's all very good.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, thank you. Yeah, I do agree with if you make the right match, and I would I some of our the clients that we signed on that were the most like no way am I doing this, they turned out to be they loved us and they loved having the care after a week or two. They if they end up liking the caregiver, it's wonderful. So making that right match is really important. And when you're doing meeting with the client, making sure you find out everything about them so you can make a good match and not put chatty Kathy with the shy little lady or exactly, exactly.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03And there's it's funny to me how there's a caregiver for everyone. I could have 10 people do not like this caregiver, just don't mesh the chemistry's off, right? And then there's that one person where that caregiver just fits beautifully, and it's like it's their everything that caregivers. Yeah, and you're and you start to lose this poor caregiver. I don't know where I'm gonna ever put them, and then it happens, and you're like, wow, thank god.
SPEAKER_02That's true. There is a match for everyone. I would totally agree with that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I agree with that, but I think that the uh the problem goes away when you have a good caregiver that comes from a good family to begin with, because that caregiver can manage a whole palette of different personalities. They're kind of born with it, they have they all have the little bag of tricks. Yeah, so I think sending out a really empathic caring caregiver, and those are words that everybody overuses, but finding somebody with the right temperament, you know, is really is important. I don't do you do you guys do you know agencies that attempt to match personalities? I don't know how you do that. I'm sorry, I know there's been people that sell software doing personality analysis and I'm not sure all that's really very predictive, but but I don't I've been going to a lot of seminars in quite a while, so maybe that's improved. But do you know of any companies that say they found some really good personality assessments that will help and sh improve the likelihood of that caregiver doing a good job with any of the things that you're doing?
SPEAKER_02I mean, seeing the software, I'm not sure. I've never personally and I haven't had anybody tell me that it works. I just ask a lot of like, are you the kind of person who wants to leave a note for the caregiver of what to do? And then they just do it and they don't talk to you and they kind of work in just behind the scenes, or do you want some back and forth? Do you I would ask those kinds of questions, and then I would always ask what makes us look successful and what is something that that would turn you off to this care completely? What or have you been with other agencies and why did you leave? What was the reasoning? And just asking a lot of those kinds of questions gave me an idea. I would I swear I was gonna put clients in categories and caregivers. I think there's probably five main, five main of each. Match chatty patty with the don't match chatty patty with drill drill sergeant client. I was going to do that because they do fit, not that people fit in boxes, but enough that there's probably five categories for each.
SPEAKER_00I what Lisa said earlier, I had a mean caregiver, and I put her with a really mean client, and they got along swimmingly. There it was great. But that that's uh that's a well pretty lucky.
SPEAKER_02I just can't yeah, it's hard, it's a hard one for sure.
SPEAKER_03I think getting to know that the client, how they move just within the assessment, just getting to know them, things they did for a living, just getting a little idea, and then knowing your caregivers, I think that's makes it a little easier to place. And sometimes you're wrong, and that's okay because you can fix that with someone else. And there are those beauties that can go anywhere.
SPEAKER_02There are. Yeah, they're like a chameleon.
SPEAKER_00They don't just yeah, those are the kind of people that, yeah. But okay, so you all agree that there really isn't any decent software out there yet that helps you to I know there's software.
SPEAKER_02I haven't used it, but I've had clients use it and not say that it was that it I haven't had anyone go, oh my god, everyone needs to try this. I've not ran into that.
SPEAKER_03I've heard of the you have you heard of the you tests? And I can't give you any more information than that, but it's the Y O U tests, and you just answer a whole bunch of different questions, and then you get a ton of response, responses. There's like a gold, a silver, uh oh, I think it's a bronze. And I can't give you much more information than that, but uh you could look up that, but I think that's more for your caregivers. I don't know if clients would be willing to take those.
SPEAKER_00Do it, yeah. I'd never give it one to a client.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. So again, you must yeah, meet with them and get that get that feel, that vibe from them. But yeah, you could give the caregivers those and put them in categories.
SPEAKER_01I think knowing your caregivers and their personalities and having the opportunity to watch them interact with other clients tells you what kind. I have some caregivers that are gonna come in and they are the take charge. They're gonna come in and be like, it's time to get in the shower. I'm pulling out shorts for you. Do you want blue or green? And sometimes that is what the client needs, and sometimes that is the polar opposite of what that client wants. So knowing your staff before you send them somewhere, but also taking the time before that staff meets their client. Hey, this is Mr. He is very cognitively aware, he is going to want his space, he's going to want you to do A and not do B. But teaching your client, because each you can be a caregiver for a hundred years and never have the same client. Every person is different. So giving your caregiver the tools before they enter the home a little bit about what they're walking into.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, and that's like the care plan, right? And the even the start of care, just walking in with them and making sure that everything feels good.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01And then sometimes the caregivers, how to help them get out of bed, that's schooling and training. But telling them that, oh, they want you to tell them before you touch them, or they want to be involved in picking this or picking that, and just giving your caregiver those tools is gonna allow a much better first three days until they get to know each other.
SPEAKER_03And some of that is common sense too. I wouldn't just walk up to someone and touch them, but sometimes we have to talk about those common sense things that people might not be thinking about too. And so dictating that in the care plan and then going over it again. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_02And while you have them, while you have the people that love this person in the assessment or on FaceTime with them, whatever you're doing, asking them what kind of caregiver are you looking for? We hire everyone. We're not going to discriminate. I'm not talking about that. What personality? What and the children will don't tell her what to do, don't boss her around. She still wants to cook. They'll tell you all kinds of things. And as Sarah said, giving that information to the caregiver ahead of time so they know what they're walking into and that and they're being respectful of the client themselves won't always tell you what they're looking for. I did have one say, Don't call me honey, sweetie, or dear. They will be out of my house so fast if they do. I've had them say that to me. So that's I letting them know ahead of time it's gonna, you're just setting it all up for success.
SPEAKER_00The more questions and more information you can get during that, the better it's I just I just remembered something something else, uh, a line that I picked up a few years ago. For for clients, the track care recipients who are a little reluctant, which means they probably have a limited ADL need, or they're not into dementia too far. They think they're just fine and they're fighting it. I'll say to them, I got this from somebody else. You you're used to taking care of everybody in the family, you've taken care of everybody all these years. Maybe you've earned it now to let some people take care of you.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I love that.
SPEAKER_00They're silent, they it hits them. You've earned it. Let's let's some let's let them take care of you for a little while. So that's really good.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I love that. Yeah, and if they get upset with their daughters or sons, I always say, You were a wonderful mother. Look, they care so much for you. Yes, they don't want to alarm. Now it's their time to worry about you.
SPEAKER_02Yep, yep.
SPEAKER_03I've said that a million trillion times.
SPEAKER_02We have a covered scenario too, because we're talking about the caregiver not being the right. So we're we covered that. So just what to remember from this is lead with empathy, always ask more questions, communicate proactively, don't wait for them to call you, solve problems early, and use trial closes. I think these are the key things with the getting them to say yes and then fixing anything that might have gone on in those first 30 days and finding out about those things because you've been proactive before they call you. Because they might think, oh, she was 15 minutes late, two days in a row. That could continue if we don't know about it. You know, that proactive being proactive is huge. So your assignment, if you would like one this week, is to choose one of your current families that is stalling or uncertain or expressing concerns. Choose the one that has the most need and ask three better questions of them. Notice what changes. See if it pay attention if the shift changes in your conversation and in your own confidence. So let us know. Annette, you are up for your talk about the sales training.
SPEAKER_04So we have we've had a busy summer for our sales training. We sold out of our July 28th class. We have our August dates listed and we're filling up. We keep the classes small. So if anybody is interested, please let us know. It's 12 weeks once in once a week, an hour via Zoom. Lots of good tips and tricks. You can be very experienced, you could not have any experience. You're gonna get something out of it. And our goal is to help you get more of those private pay referrals. So please let us know if you'd like more information. And by week six, what happens generally? If you're doing what we say, you get referrals.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, if you're out, if you're if you're out and about and you're you know making mistakes, being consistent, bringing the things with you, doing the things, yeah. It happens.
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